My year of "keeping the channel open"

I've already met a lot of really cool people while in Kenya and am excited to be making friends. In particular, there are a group of girls who work in Kibera (the biggest slum in Africa) who are all exactly my age and just out of wesleyan and brown. A few of them have decided that this is "the year of yes" which i think is a really cool idea. It means, any time someone invites them to do something, no matter how much they would like to stay home, they will go. They are ready to experience what this year has to offer. I love the idea and it is the type of thing that I am drawn to. Especially while in Kenya, but really, anywhere. Only, the thing is, after thinking about it for a week or two, I've had to acknowledge to myself that this is not my year of yes. I guess that means it is my year of something else. But what?

I flipped through my book of quotations and poems, and almost all of them give the kind of advice that seems to push for a year of yes. But this one (below) is different. It isn't about pushing yourself to experience everything, which sometimes is really important to do, but its about listening to yourself. So I have to listen, and when I do, I know that it isn't my year of yes- and that's okay- its my year of listening. Of keeping the channel open.

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There is a vitality, a life force, a quickening that is translated through you into action and because there is only one of you in all time, this expression is unique.
And if you block it, it will never exist through any other medium and will be lost. The world will not have it. It is not your business to determine how good it is nor how valuable it is nor how it compares with other expressions. It is your business to keep it yours clearly and directly, to keep the channel open.
You do not even have to believe in yourself or your work. You have to keep open and aware directly to the urges that motivate you.
Keep the channel open.

No artist is pleased. There is no satisfaction whatever at any time. There is only a queer, divine dissatisfaction, a blessed unrest that keeps us marching and makes us more alive.

-Martha Graham to Agnes de Mille